Tuesday, May 11, 2010

A Mans Guide To Dating Women Of The World

From DjMick:

dating

WHITE WOMEN:

First date: You get to kiss her goodnight.

Second date: You get to grope all over and make out a bit.

Third date: You get to have sex but only in the missionary position.

ITALIAN WOMEN:

First Date: You take her to a play and an expensive restaurant.

Second Date: You meet her parents and her Mom makes spaghetti & meatballs.

Third Date: You have sex, she wants to marry you & insists on a 3-carat ring.

5th Anniversary: You already have 5 kids together & hate the thought of having sex.

6th Anniversary: You find yourself a Mistress.

dating

JEWISH WOMEN:

First Date: You get terrific head.

Second Date: You get even more great head.

Third Date: You tell her you’ll marry her and never get head again.

CHINESE WOMEN:

First date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.

Second date: You buy her an even more expensive dinner. Nothing happens again.

Third date: You don’t even get to the third date and you’ve already realized nothing is ever going to happen.

dating

IRISH WOMEN:

First Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.

Second Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.

20th Anniversary: You both get blind drunk and have sex.

INDIAN WOMEN:

First date: Meet her parents.

Second date: Set the date of the wedding.

Third date: Wedding night.

dating

MEXICAN WOMEN:

First Date: You buy her an expensive dinner, get drunk on Tequila, and have sex in the back of her car.

Second Date: She’s pregnant.

Third Date: She moves in. One week later, her mother, father, his girlfriend, her two sisters, her brother, all of their kids, her grandma, her father’s girlfriend’s mother, her two cousins, her sister’s Boyfriend and his three kids move in and you live on rice and beans for the rest of your life in your home that used to be nice, but now looks like a home along the Tijuana strip.

BLACK WOMEN:

First Date: You get to buy her a real expensive dinner.

Second Date: You get to buy her and her girlfriends a real expensive dinner.

Third Date: You get to pay her rent.

Tenth Date: She’s pregnant by someone other than you.

flogging

ARAB WOMEN:

First Date: Mother, Father, Brothers, Sisters, Cousins, Aunts, Uncles, Friends and entire arab community finds out.

Second Date: You are flogged in public until you are dead.

No third date.

2 Comments:

Blogger Jack Kehoe said...

I'm married to an Irish woman.

Yep.

8:43 PM  
Blogger Pastorius said...

Good for you.

I'm married to a Filipino woman. There are some pretty great things about that. But, I'll only tell you in private.

7:24 AM  

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